Thursday 25 December 2014

Christmas, New Year and 2014

Greetings,

Firstly, “Merry Christmas” to all those who celebrate it and as I don’t plan on posting before January the 1st, a happy new year to everyone. May your 2015 be as wonderful, exciting and perfect as our 2014!

Having had a ‘family’ Christmas, we still managed to add a slightly ‘Gorean’ touch. The men, including my baby brother, got served first. They opened pressies first, and were never short of drink, food or anything else they might need.
And, thankfully, as my family accept my position as a ‘Gorean woman’, I got kitchen equipment for our new house – lots of things I needed to keep his kitchen running to the standard he expects!

The day was spent relaxing on the deck, drinking wine, watching the stags sun themselves across the road, followed by a home kill Muscovy duck, which got cooked up for dinner.

Looking forward to another trip to the beach soon, but hopefully on a cooler day – hot sand-burnt feet isn’t something I look forward to.

As for resolutions, I’m sure most people make resolutions every year, and consider the fact that they kept them for a week or more as an ‘achievement.’ Those that know me will know I’ve struggled this year with my own resolutions, or, more the point, the resolutions added by my Master.

Reading 45 books or more – Done! I would list them, but I can’t be bothered.

Write (three projects) – Done, although only in draft form.

Write a letter each month – Yes! I’ve written at least once a month to a friend. ^^

Keep track of daily food/drink – Yes, I keep a diary.

Drink more water and tea, less chemical drinks. – Yes, although I haven’t cut down chemical drinks enough for mine, or my Masters, liking.

Run a mile in less than X minutes – YES! Woohoo! No, I’m not saying the number of minutes – it doesn’t matter if it’s sixty-two or two, point is, I did it!

Swim more frequently – Yes, a bit of a stumble when I was ill, but I’m swimming regularly now.

Make at least four types of successful jam – yes, I’ve found a LOVE of jam/preserve making!

Finish crafts - Stitch finished, lace started.

So yes, I’ve completed most of my resolutions – some small ones I’ve not managed, but that just leaves room for next years’ resolutions! <3

I wish you well,
Kamira.



Sunday 9 November 2014

The Beginning of a New Era...?

To be continued....

I wish you well, 
Kamira.

Tuesday 21 October 2014

How do I live?

I have been reading another series recently, written by a man named R. Scott Bakker. He spends his time writing philosophy and fiction, and admits that he sometimes finds it difficult to differentiate between the two. For me, this is what drove me to read his work – after all, my admiration for philosophy and the different interpretations that incorporates, drove me to explore the Gorean side of things, but Gor is such a narrow (and personal) interpretation of philosophy.

Scott Bakkers writing is more ‘wizards and sorcery’ than ‘natural order’. But there are some interesting parts that I find profound. I won’t be going into them here, as I don’t believe they are relevant to every person who claims Gorean influences and because I don’t believe in ‘telling’ people how philosophy should affect them. That is for the individual to read and discover in their own way, in their own preferred forms. The series has, however, brought to mind one important question that I would like to address, more for myself than for anyone else.

How should an individual live?

The answer, I found, referred me back to my Gorean ‘roots.’

"Do not ask the stones or the trees how to live; they cannot tell you; they do not have tongues; do not ask the wise man how to live, for, if he knows, he will know he cannot tell you; if you would learn how to live do not ask the question; its answer is not in the question but in the answer, which is not in words; do not ask how to live, but, instead, proceed to do so." – Marauders.

The books are full of people who teach (and discover) small parts of themselves and their likes, dislikes and lives in general much like we are taught from birth – not all at once. I suppose the issue, for us, is that we try to unlearn so much and relearn it “The Gorean Way” in such a short space of time. We look for shortcuts, for simple answers to complex questions. We prefer to ask online for an answer rather than look for it ourselves.
Many people will say ‘but slaves, at least, just do what their owners tell them’. This is one of the saddest things I have heard. Slaves are far more than robots, they do more than just follow commands. While they must (obviously) have exquisite beauty and be absolutely obedient - they are people, and as such they must understand, and develop independently to their owners. Otherwise they just become a clone of the one they are with, and if that relationship is severed, what would they be? Nothing of their own making. They would have no self, no opinions of their own.

Our lives, especially our Gorean-led lives, are more a journey of self-discovery than they are a ‘revision’ for a test, in which there is a right answer and a wrong answer. Which is where I, and many others, have fallen.

There is so much emphasis on following others, we forget that Goreans follow themselves, and their own discoveries. We are all different, all with our own natures, formed from our past and our upbringing.

How to train me, to teach me, in the understanding of the order of nature, and the day-to-day attitude of Gorean slavery? How to train me, to teach me, how to function as a successful kajira in a society of non-Gorean people that I come into contact with on a daily basis?
I, personally, have no Gorean family to teach me from birth. I only have myself, my master, and our friends. Each bringing something different to the table that shapes my understanding of the world around me, and myself. There are no maps to follow, no footprints in the sand that guide my way.
I feel much like Tarl as he explores Gor, in that my Gorean life is forever changing, adapting and re-evaluating as I meet others. I learn from them, as I hope they learn from me. Even if those lessons are sometimes simply how NOT to conduct myself.

How should I live?
Humbly, as best I can, with an open but strong mind. Journeying with the understanding that my opinions will change, that my outlook will change, as I encounter others with more information and opinions.
Kindly, knowing that there will be many ahead of me, and many behind me. That I am not the first, and not the last, to rethink my views.
Openly, life has many branches – only a fool would not explore as many as possible.
And above all else, I should live as close to MY idea of natural order as I can, as close to my values and views, regardless of others scorn or disagreement.

I should, and thankfully do, evolve emotionally and mentally, in Asmodeus’ collar.

I wish you well,

Kamira.

Sunday 28 September 2014

Busy, But Not Forgotten!

Greetings,

As I’m sure some are aware – my owner is keeping me busy at the moment. Which sadly means I haven’t had time to write a blog post recently. However, I have progressed greatly in other areas.

I look forward to the upcoming meeting, and hope to see everyone there. Fingers crossed for good weather.

I wish you well,

Kamira. 

Friday 22 August 2014

BDSM Equipment?

The idea that BDSM and Gor can intertwine is one I’ve gone into in the past. I’m not going to rehash the same ol’ Fetlife rants and counter-rants. I’m absent from the childishness for a reason – it gets boringly repetitive. Instead I’m going to try to delve into WHY there is even this argument in the first place. Is there any basis for BDSM ‘play’ to mingle with Gorean ‘reality’?

Yes, is the simple answer. I believe there is.

There are MANY implements of discipline and control used on Gor that are considered toys. All of these can be used in both BDSM and Gorean settings. Although MANY of these have psychologically different effects on a Gorean slave than a BDSM slave.

Rings – Used to secure a slave, sometimes outside (buildings, shops, markets), sometimes inside (on the end of beds, couches).

Ankle Rack– BDSM calls it ‘spreader bars,’ as do the Red Savages of Gor.

Slave sack/Slave hood – BDSM calls it ‘sensory deprivation’ and it can be just the head for a ‘hood’ or an entire body experience.

Collars/Bracelets or wrist cuffs/anklets or ankle cuffs – BDSM have an entire RAINBOW of different collar types, as Goreans have theirs. 

The Iron belt – a BDSM ‘chastity belt’?

Binding fibre/Rope – Kind of self explanatory as to how this works in both?

Goad – The slave goad mentioned briefly in the books sounds remarkably like a portable/self charging violet wand...

Whips – Self explanatory.

Chains – Self explanatory.

I could go on, but the point of this post isn’t to create a neverending list.

So, then there are the venues of both ‘lifestyle choices’. The Paga taverns and Alcoves for ‘ravishing’ a slave – are they really any different to Swingers clubs? Many men can have the same woman.. I hear some people say “But the difference is that money doesn’t change hands.” ..What do you think the entrance fee is for? Often, don’t women get in for free but men have to pay the house? (but, of course, the reverse is true - in private, or more exclusive Gorean banquets the slaves are used freely, without fee changing hands).

What about the comparison to a normal pub? How many women go out on a Friday or Saturday night looking for a one night stand? For a drink or two, they’ll be round the back of the carpark, going at it like the Energiser Bunny! Before anyone gets offended – not all women are like this, obviously, but the fact that some can be bought for less than a fiver in a cheap pub chain can’t be ignored. These aren’t the type of women you’d want to take home to your mother – but I don’t remember every man entering a Paga Tavern looking for a lifelong Free Companion! A nights ‘jolly’ was all that was expected.

And I haven’t even touched on the ‘dungeon’ similarities!

So yes, I suppose given the overwhelming evidence.. There is a basis for the argument of BDSM-Gor. The problem, however, is that the books are both very clear and very ambiguous. The main BDSM dispute coming from: Sadism is basically unknown on Gor. It is seen as a disease for a man (or woman) to be sadistic.
HOWEVER
It is often noted that a Master or Mistress may punish for no reason, or simply because the slave is a slave. Is that not indulging in the sadistic whims of the dominant? I assume, and it is an assumption, that no freeperson would randomly beat a slave if they despised such things. Why hit, when a) there is no reason, and b) no enjoyment? But then, the slave often commented, in words or in thought, that she wishes to feel the whip, so she knows herself subject to it. She WANTS to feel the painful bite of the switch, or the heavy lash of the five bladed whip. Why? Because she LIKES to know her owner can cause pain her, if he wishes. It makes her more HIS by being subject to HIS whip. She doesn’t have to like the kiss of the whip, but she likes the manifestation of the dominant and submissive roles. Much like a masochist doesn’t HAVE to LIKE the feeling of the lash. Like most things in life, people get different things out of it. Personally, my BDSM experiences weren’t about enjoying pain – but rather being subject to someone elses enjoyment... Even if that caused me pain.

How is that different from BDSM sadists and masochists? Can we REALLY defend our views, when they are not black and white, even in John Normans words?

Now, I still don’t believe that needles, wax, cutting, violet wands or pet play are Gorean traits. But, I can see the argument for at least some of them – although I would argue that one is used PURELY for discipline and for maintaining control, while the other CAN be more relaxed and ‘enjoyable’ (If that is the right word?) for both sides.

Why not just agree to disagree? If you don’t like what someone else is doing there is a simple solution – don’t be around them. There are over seven billion people in the world – why let one persons interpretation and preferences cause ripples in your ideal pool? There is no harm in them being wrong!

I wish you well,

Kami.

Wednesday 2 July 2014

Serving is so much easier than Second Life

So many people find Gor online these days, whether they are haphazardly exploring a BDSM site like Fetlife, or delving into the world of 3D chats like Second Life. But these are, mostly, more of a hindrance than a help.

I found Gor through a chat room, and after then moving to real life I had to ‘unlearn’ many things.

Chat rooms have their purpose, of course, they can be excellent places to debate and discuss – but they can also be filled with misinformation that on its own is harmless, but when coupled with the curiosity of a new person and the eagerness to learn – it can have a negative effect.

Even the best of ‘by-the-books’ role play rooms are very ‘narrow’ in their portrayal of Gor. How many slaves in the books were able to come and go as they please? How many of them were whipped without feeling the lash? How about serving, without having to worry about spilling hot water, or tidying up spilled sugar? None. How many ‘worked’ for an hour a day, or two? Few.

Time is one of the biggest things – and the fact that free or slave only has to ‘abide by the rules’ during certain times of the day, week or month, depending on when they ‘feel like’ popping in. If only in reality we could deal with things only when we FELT like serving, or FELT like being honourable!

So while it is different, and a slave must learn to think and act in certain ways in reality, it is very different from typing it on a website. A serving of tea takes minutes in person, and I’ve seen it take over an hour online. The slaves may be brilliant at ‘sashaying across the floor, hips wiggling provocatively’, or whatever it is they feel like doing.. But doing it with a full cup of steaming coffee is completely another.


Personally, online could never have prepared me for having to do things that I didn’t want to do. Some days I don’t FEEL like making bread, cleaning, practising my lace or exercising – but it’s required of me by my master, and so without groaning, complaining, sighing – it has to be done. There are days when I have to be up early, or late, despite being tired – it has to be done. I can’t just turn it off when I feel like it and go ‘back to reality,’ picking it up as and when it suits me, because unlike roleplay, this IS my reality – as it is for others. 

I wish you well,
Kamira.

Wednesday 18 June 2014

A Day in the Life of THIS Slave.

Who’s to say what a day is to consist of, for a slave? But despite the variety of options and answers, it is one of the most frequent questions I get asked.

“What DO you DO all day?”
“Don’t you get BORED?”

The simple answer is ‘no’.

But I suppose I’d better answer it in more detail than that – after all, it would be a pretty bad blog post if that was all it consisted of.

My days vary, depending on when and where my Master is working. If he’s working away, and I’m not with him, I have a lot of freedom and I can do things at my own schedule (as long as things get done!). If he is working from home, I am expected to keep quiet, be attentive to his needs without being intrusive AND do my daily ‘expectations’. If he is off, often he’ll relax while I cook/clean for the day, then we’ll go out. Of course, this is not set in stone and there are days where routine goes straight out of the window!

One of the main things, I suppose, is that I enjoy my own company – I dislike people, as a general rule, so I don’t get ‘lonely.’ I’ve always labelled myself fairly anti-social, which others will agree with... Give me a book in the corner over being in the spotlight any day... Sadly I don’t always get that privilege! When left to my own devices, I’ll read, research topics, recipes, re-read books, and generally snuggle down with a cup of tea and my own thoughts.

Then there are my pets, my boys – now, I admit I care for my boys more than I care for people (in general). I spend more time with them during the day that is probably necessary. They get run twice a week, and handled daily. They get cleaned out twice a week too... and as those at the last encampment will agree – they make a heck of a mess, and not just in their cage!

I cook – from scratch. This year I’m learning to make jams and preserves (and chutneys as a side thing.. But mainly jams and preserves) this is something I’m learning about, and practising. I bake bread and cakes, at LEAST six of seven main meals a week, if we’re not entertaining clients, are traditionally made and home cooked (none of this ‘buy a sauce and chuck in Tesco horse meat’!). Being rurally located, we have local produce all around us – and I make frequent trips to see their shops and farm stores. Normally every two days (daily in the summer, for fresh salad).

I clean – and not just a ‘quick tidy up’. I clean daily, normally one room a day. Then, for example – the chrome taps and oven get cleaned weekly, the wooden furniture gets treated fortnightly, etc.  And the jets in the bath are enough of a hassle to warrant never wanting them again, but they have to be done once a week (Masters decision!). The tile floors get scrubbed (by hand), etc, etc.

I volunteer regularly, in a couple of different places. Although in fairness this is normally just a few times a month. Master jokes I also ‘volunteer’ for his business as I do his monthly accounts and correspond with people re: that.

So, if asked to ‘plan’ a day in the life of me, I suppose it would be easiest to plan a day when my Master was away. He can leave any time, depending on his travel time/destination.

I suppose it would consist, roughly, of:
2hrs of cleaning 
1hr of cleaning (general: dishes, washing // other – like treating the furniture)
1hr – Shopping / Daily errands
1hr or more – Crafts / Writing / Reading
1hr or more – Cooking / Baking
1hr or more – Exercise (90mins if it’s a running day, 120mins if it’s a swimming day)

Roughly an 8hr day, not taking into account  the daily personal routine I have and the other things I’m either not willing (or allowed) to discuss. So yes – that just about covers it.


So for all those who complain I can’t ‘possibly manage’ without getting bored. I guess I can only say that I ‘manage’ because I am able to think for myself, and have a Master who doesn’t ALLOW me to lounge around like some vanillas.

Saturday 3 May 2014

Branded, Sized and Weighed

There is very little mentioned about sizing. It is said that all kinds of ‘block measurements are taken, from the common to the unusual. Presumably on Gor this is because some are classed as ‘Exotics’ and therefore chances are some are bred to have specific features and mutations (like long or pointed ears, for example). Using the book as reference, it is clear that there are four standard sizes for the wrist and ankle. Simply a slave is either size one, two, three or four on her wrist and ankle. While the numbers appear to be separate (a size 3 wristlet is not the same as a size 3 anklet), it is stated that men prefer women with ‘matching’ wrists and ankles (ie. Both the slaves wrists and ankles are a size 2).
‘One’ is considered small, ‘two’ and ‘three’ are most common while ‘four’ is considered large. Unfortunately only one size is commented on in the book in figures. A size two anklet has an interior circumference of about 8.8inches (conversion rounded to one dp) while a size two wristlet has just over 6.2inches inner circumference.

This implies (although it is never explicitly stated) that the smallest ‘standard’ slave – by which I would class all non-exotic/non-specifically-bred woman (ie. All Earth women) – is smaller than these measurements. It is hard to believe this is possible, but assuming the height of a slave can vary as much as our own gene pool it stands to reason a shorter, or naturally slimmer, girl could be fit and healthy with such measurements.

Weight, also, is not touched upon as much in the earlier books. However as the series progresses we do get an idea, and then a figure, for the ‘Gorean woman’. Most slave girls (bar farm or northern girls) are lithe, soft skinned, slim but curved. Obesity, it is stated, is a luxury of slovenly free women (If someone could find me that quote, I would be grateful...).

“She was, in measurements with which those of her background [Earth] would be familiar, some five feet five inches in height, and something like one hundred and eighteen pounds in weight.” – Smugglers, Pg. 5

It goes on to say that this is not special, or unusual. This gives a BMI of about 19 – which indicates that the Earth standards of ‘normal and healthy’ are roughly the same as Gorean standards. By Earth standards, an average five foot five woman should weigh between about 8 stone and 10.5 stone. I would assume, like Earth standards, body fat percentage is important too. Muscle weighing more than fat, a ten stone girl would presumably have more muscle, not more muffin.

Brands are not dependant on size or weight – that is, that every woman with a kef brand, on Earth that is the lithe 120lb woman AND 600lb “whalejira” should have a one and a half inch high, half an inch wide kef brand – if they have anything at all.. But that is a different discussion. (And before anyone comments on my chosen words – remember; “my blog, my words.” Don’t like it? Find somewhere else to escape your life – might I suggest the UK TV channels CBBC, or Challenge? Both are suitably... dumbed down and censored.) The same goes for the floral Dina and all other Gorean brands – one size fits all. 

I wish you well, 
Kamira.

Saturday 12 April 2014

The Good Habits that Must be Encouraged

Assuming, as I have in the last post, that JN used traditional Earthly vices, it stands to reason that his characters also have the ideal VIRTUES of our history.
The traditional (religious) virtues, as far as I can see are – Chastity, Temperance, Charity, Diligence, Patience, Kindness and Humility

Castitas – (Chastity) – The virtue to the vice ‘Lust’.
While on the surface this would seem contradictory to the daily life of Gorean slavery, it’s original meaning differs slightly from our modern interpretation. Much like ‘lust’ in my last post.
It implied self control, from intoxicants (drink/drugs), from temptation and corruption (don’t go for what is easy, go for what is HONOURABLE – a VERY Gorean thought).

Temperantia – (Temperance) – The virtue to the vice ‘Gluttony’.
A more ‘easily’ relatable Gorean virtue, for obvious reasons! Self-control is RATHER important – especially as the slaves loved ones are the ones impacted by their behaviour.

Caritas – (Charity) – The virtue to the vice ‘Envy’.
The latin original indicated that ‘love’ was the most important charitable act, rather than the more common ‘give money, goods or support’ – it emphasised unconditional love for others.
A slave is expected to behave appropriately regardless of how someone else is. They are taught to be subservient, polite, and generally un-obtrusive in their views and opinions. Obviously, slaves are human and WILL judge. The difference between a good slave and a bad slave is the ability to learn to bite their tongue!
This is probably the hardest virtue for me personally, as I find it hard to remember it’s not MY place to judge people on their actions – I’m to be neutral, if I can’t be nice... Which isn’t always possible, easy or practical in our modern world. But I’m working on it!!!

Industria – (Diligence) – The virtue to the vice ‘Sloth’. Basically working hard, and not being lazy, while also having integrity in all you do.
Another ‘easily’ relatable virtue. Slaves aren’t allowed to be slovenly, this is a basic skill – one so many I’ve met have yet to acquire! It also, to me, speaks of not giving up – if you can’t do it the first time, don’t just give up, a slave tries to perfect herself.

Patientia – (Patience) – The virtue to the vice ‘Wrath’.
Another one I struggle with, as do many others. This virtue is about resolving issues with peace and forgiveness (even if the other person is in the wrong!) – slaves are expected to let many things go over their heads, insults being a common one in the books. It is the free persons (normally the owners) decision to get upset or feel the need to resolve any conflict.

 Humanitas – (Kindness) – The virtue to the vice ‘Greed’. This, to me, links closely to the idea of ‘charity’.
A slave is expected to be kind, unselfish in their acts and compassionate towards others. This isn’t always shown in the books (where envy, and greed often get in the way first) but even the most opposed slaves often find a common ground, and a respect for each other. In some small way!

Humilitas – (Humility) – The virtue to the vice ‘Pride’.
“True humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” – C. S. Lewis
Give credit where credit is due, regardless of who the person is and personal opinions.
((I’d like to add, writing this short bit about Humilitas has reminded me of a recent event on a social media site. Regardless of my thoughts and opinions of the people involved, I can honestly say credit is due to those who stand up, and are honest about, their profession. To ridicule anyone for MAKING A LIVING WITHOUT the handouts of benefits or ‘mummy’ is, in my opinion, unGorean. Even ‘High Castes’ didn’t put down the lowly ‘peasant’ for plowing the fields.))

As I stated in the ‘Vices’ post – please don’t confuse the Latin words for ‘Real Gorean Words’ – to my knowledge there is no ‘Gorean’ words stated for the virtues in the books.
They are interpreted by me – and certainly helped me discover and understand more about my life path.

I wish you well,
Kamira.

Friday 21 March 2014

Bad Habits that Must be Broken

Given than JN based his series on historical fact – it stands to reason that his ideal kajira has none of the ‘traditional’ bad habits. This makes it difficult for us, as obviously we are raised in a modern world. Men, and Free, have less of an issue – they can do as they please, to a certain extent. Slaves on the other hand, have to unlearn many things that are considered ‘normal.’

The Seven Deadly Sins are: Envy, Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Pride, Sloth and Wrath.


Ira – (Wrath) – Wrath, or rage, is an uncontrollable feeling of anger or hatred. It fuels violence and harm.
It’s clear that a violent slave would QUICKLY learn not to be so, or face the wrath of a much stronger free man. Slaves may not touch weapons (although, in reality, this isn’t so black and white - I’m permitted to clean and move them, I’m just to ask permission first)

Luxuria – (Lust) – While we now associate ‘lust’ with sex, or sexual need, the Latin origin ACTUALLY has a far broader meaning. Thus, someone can be ‘lusting after’ or desiring  money, success or even more basic needs like food.
This traditional meaning has far more meaning than the modern version, in a Gorean sense, as a slave should not desire money, fame or power. Such things are not for Gorean slaves, we are considered chattel ourselves, and so we are to be lusted over, not to be lustful ourselves. What we are given, is what we need – there is no reason for more. 

Gula/Gluttire – (Gluttony) – The over consumption of food, eating too many meals a day, eating too quickly or generally eating ‘too rich’ food.
Slaves ARE permitted to eat quickly, although it is more pleasurable for the free to watch a slave eat slowly, savouring the food she has been permitted. It is rare that a slave gets the opportunity to eat as much as they like, as they are expected to keep to their optimum block measurements.

Acedia – (Sloth) –  Sloth is often shown as laziness, by not doing what you should, or are expected to do.
This is an unacceptable trait for a slave, they are expected to behave according to their status.
There is a difference between being lazy, and being (say) ill and having to lay down.

Avaritia – (Greed) – Greed is often linked with Gluttony, but Greed has a far broader meaning. It is often linked to the motivation to steal or deceive someone. It results, commonly, in gaining physical possessions.
Obviously, this is something slaves are not permitted. There are examples of slaves being greedy and stealing from their sisters, and even when out foraging for berries – but they are always swiftly punished and understand it is not something they should aspire to. There is also an example of a new slave being questioned, and the free men being disappointed with her deceptive answers.

Invidia – (Envy) – Like jealousy, envy is the need and want for someone elses possessions, social standing or traits (looks or personality). It often results in happiness when another person loses that which is envied.
While it is known, widely, that slaves envy other slaves their position (favourite to the master, more freedoms than them, etc) BUT it is not acceptable for them to envy the free – the free woman, however, is sometimes said to envy a slaves freedom.

Superbia – (Pride) – Pride is considered the oldest and most deadly of the seven sins. It is often considered a prerequisite to the other six as it is the belief that you are fundamentally more important than others, to the point of ignoring the successes and accomplishments of others, even ‘playing down’ their abilities.
One of the most commonly commented on in the books, especially in relation to slaves. It is stated NUMEROUS times that a slave is not permitted pride, and it is clear why!

For those not familiar with Latin do not confuse these words with ‘Real Gorean Words,’ they are the Latin/Original names for our now commonly used ‘seven sins’. Such words in Gorean are never stated.

So those are the 'Seven Gorean Sins', as interpreted by ME - at least for a slave. Something for everyone to aspire to, I'm sure.

Wednesday 19 February 2014

A Brand

Everybody and their dog (literally, if you go by some usernames or personalities!) has debated the importance, or lack thereof, of a brand.
They’ve also debated the issues with a real brand compared to a tattoo. I’m not getting into that debate – my view is clear, I have a brand (not tattoo) on my left thigh, that was put there EXACTLY as the books describe (so that dispels the myth of ‘it’ll kill a girl? Unless I’m a ghostie-jira?) – hot iron, inch and a half high, and half an inch wide.

Now... I DON’T recommend others have it done, unless properly prepared for the consequences.

Firstly, and most obviously, brands aren’t readily available on supermarket shelves. My Master made mine, and I’m allowed to keep it (now unusable) with me, it currently lives on the bedside table, on the lamp I use for reading. It took him ages and many attempts to make it – his first one wasn’t right, and if you’re going to do it, you need a perfectly straight piece of metal – or it’s going to show as uneven in the brand.

Heating the brand – isn’t as easy as you think. It can’t be too hot, and it can’t be too cold. Master worked on that, and to be honest I don’t remember much of the heating or branding process.. I think I blocked most of that out, as brains are prone to doing when it’s in pain! Holding it on my skin, I’m told, took plenty of focus – as he had to work out just long enough to brand, not so long as to maim (Thankfully, he got that right!)

Healing time is A LOT longer than the books – in the books the next day the slave is bouncing around serving. I was still shaking (your body goes into shock) two days later, and being fed sugary tea by my Master. He took time off work to look after me, and didn’t leave my side for more than a couple of minutes (to shower, for example) for about a week, after that I went to work with him for nearly two months as my thigh healed. I wouldn’t recommend a BTB brand unless this is a possibility. Even then, if it starts to get infected – go to the hospital. Mine did (as people know, I’m uber sensitive) but thankfully with painful salt solutions and over-the-counter antiseptics, we were prepared and kept it to a minimum, and didn’t require a hospital visit.

We’ve always kept my brand ‘under wraps’. This is because my Master has never wanted people to repeat it, it still aches in the cold, and has occasionally rubbed against tight clothing (don’t expect to do long horse treks with a brand – I learnt that the hard way!). This is still the case – but now, after three years (Moved to him November ’09, branded Sept ’10, engaged December ‘12, married November ’13) He’s allowing me to post a couple of pictures.

So... Here we go –
When it was first done:
(Day One, almost immediately after branding)

Now, three years on:




Is my brand perfect? No. Perfection is not an achievable goal. But I’d love to see someone who has had a BTB brand (right size, hot, hand branded) that’s better.



We expect it to change further in the future, lighter scarring around the edge will fade, as it already has in places. If the kef fades (which we don’t believe it will), it will be his decision whether to rebrand me or not. I don’t relish the idea of going through the pain again – but that’s not my decision.. and since I promised to ‘love honour and obey’ him, I don’t plan on breaking my promise.

Friday 17 January 2014

On Being a Slave, a Wife or a Free Companion

As many know, I’ve been many things during my time with @AsmodeusGM – notably a slave, a free companion and a wife.
The similarities are astounding. People assume that free women, and thus free companions are much like the ‘female dominants’ of BDSM. This is so far from the truth it is a clear indication on who has failed to grasp the concept JN was CLEARLY trying to put across.
Free women have the right to say and act how they wish – they may be petulant and obnoxious if they wish. HOWEVER it is always the man that has the final say. Whether that is in the conversation (there are many examples of “Be quiet, Woman.” styled comments when a man gets fed up with hearing a Free Womans voice), or in the longer term the collaring of a particular woman who has scorned a man. Like slaves, the Free Woman is ultimately accountable for her actions, she is expected to be feminine and generally ‘unmanly.’ She sits differently than the men (she kneels, compared to the cross legged position of a man), and her behaviour is a reflection on the men of her blood and home.

Of course, marriage can be completely different to both a slave-life or that of a free companionship – it depends on the people. However, personally, the vows I repeated in front of friends and family were to ‘love, honour and obey.’ This, in my situation, puts me more on par with a slave before a collar is placed. A traditional English wife has far more in common with JN’s idea of a ‘kajira’ than the Free Woman – the history and reason behind this is clear.

Master Asmodeus decided my vows, he planned the event, and he chose my outfit. In this it was clear to ME what the dynamic was to be, and what my place was – but to my vanilla family and friends it was nothing more than a ‘normal-albeit-slightly-more-traditional’ wedding.

Returning to England, I held the keys to my bracelet and collar – not because I could take them on and off as I pleased, but because it would potentially reduce the confusion while going through metal detectors.
Ironically, despite this precaution, there was no issue or question to my ‘unusual jewelery’ – even in American security (takes away the excuse, doesn’t it!?).

~

Freedom is an interesting concept, one that I’ve preferred not to touch on greatly. Possibly because, having experienced all three dynamics, I find more freedom in slavery - which in itself is a paradox, obviously, and one that I haven’t spent a great deal of time mulling over. The simple fact is, I am more comfortable in a collar and it is something I am just happy to accept, even if that comes with the playful ‘told you so’ teasing of my Master.

I wish you well,
Kamira

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